me vs. the (teenage) world

maybe that's just it. i'm sick of being the world's best friend to everyone, but having literally the only person with the remote possibility of doing the same 2000 miles away. i'm tired of all these layers i have, how i won't do anything about what people think. i let them think i am incapable, that i'm a blonde ditz. i guess they kind of know i'm kind of smart, but i hate that "oh she's so out there" look. i also hate my "friends" acting like i am the stupid one. all of them are really stupid ("oh i could just google it? you went to school? *nods like they wrote the wikipedia for that*). all of this "yep i totally understand though i have no clue what you're saying let's talk about something i understand, like this celebrity* crap is so elementary school. there's this psychology theory about egos. i think part of my problem is that i am too darn lazy to go out there and get some real friends. the rest of my problem is that my ego is at least a level 6, while my "friends" have a level 2 or 3 ego. which means they like to comment on my "blond moments" like i am honest-to-God stupid and/or dense. i mean, my 11-year-old brother has a more developed ego than them (i think he'a between 3 and 4; he shows characteristics from both so imo he'a just leaving e3).


i hate this whole physical geography thing. :P

it's been a while

whoa. i have no idea why i originally made this blog; maybe just for something personal?

but, yeah. i finished my apps to a local community college; priority deadline is april 15 and i wanted my mom to drop it off yesterday.

gettin' things done.

Almost finalized with my schedule. Just have to do some paperwork tomorrow to completely finalize things.
Homeschooling next semester.. which ends at the end of January..

So. Basically, my subjects:

Math. This will be finishing my Saxon Advanced Math curriculum (I have ~30 lessons left. So, 1/3 of the semester dedicated to that. Plus, I have bunches of tests to complete. Add two weeks for that.. yeah) and self-studying Calculus for the CLEP test. I'll do that sometime this summer, plus with MIT Openware I could possibly skip Calc 2 at the U, too. But idk how solid my math stuff would be if I did that.
Chemistry. I'd basically study with Apologia Chemistry, doing about a chapter a week (therefor finishing the book in the semester). I'd do the SAT Chemistry and CLEP Chemistry tests.
English. This one is the hardest. First off, I have some practice MCA-Reading tests before the real thing in March. Otherwise, I have Spelling, Grammar, and Vocab; plus, I have more time to read(!) and I could study a novel in-depth for a quarter (the first one would be The Scarlet Letter, where I would read and do study guides, and conclude with watching the movie). Yup.
French. This one is a little more tricky. I have to finish out the Holt curriculum (that's what I was using this past year-and-a-half), and I can do more literature and stuff. On Fridays, I'll learn a little Malayan French. I'll come back to this.
Elective - Computer Programming. This class meets at the school and is 8-9:30 MWF. I like it.
Social Studies- I'd do a language study. Doing an intro to a few languages that pique my interest, AKA Gaelic, Italian, German, Latin, and maybe Norwegian. I'd test this with crossword puzzles and online assessments.

Mhm. Sounds fun.

Cheers.
Destiny.

On Equality and Americanism.

Sometimes, I wonder why our definition of "civilized" is so twisted. I mean, we have to label people as guys/girls. Why?? Like, what's it matter that HE said that or SHE did this. I mean, does it make that much of a difference if someone is a girl or a boy? If we really want both genders to be truly equal, then the English language has to get rid of masculine and feminine subjects. Yeah, I don't know what would replace it, but pretty much anything would be more beneficial to reaching equality than where we are now.

Right?

I can't be the only one who thought of this. The fact that the language of English has to evolve in order for it to remain very much an "alive" language is not news. It will just take someone really devoted to this to make this change.

On a tangent, France has (semi-)recently removed the word "mademoiselle" from its language, due to people protesting that there are two choices for females, and only "monsieur" for males. I wonder if America will ever take France's lead...

Cheers. 

Destiny.

Delirious.

you're missing from me.
a cruel and (un)fortunate trick played by
none other than Sir Kismet himself, who was forever scarred with the delirious mark of chaste.
If thou deem it worthy,
i'd go (to you).
a desperate vengeance flashing through
my eyes, it would take but a few hours
and you should know i'd waste thousands of them to be with you (again).
we were at the wrong place at the wrong
time.
and you know all too well how time cannot be glued back together;
for it is dynamic and intangible and gone (forever).
you're my missing piece.
my soulmate.
and i lost you.

Something Personal.

"Geez, you're so smart."
"Why do you have to be so smart?"

You know my name, and perhaps some of my classes. You don't know my story.

So.

I stabbed myself with a pencil. Heed my warnings and beware thy backpack in disorder.